What’s Wrong With Me

Why is it that the first place we go to when we’re upset, angry or ill is ‘what’s wrong with me’. I’ve had a few conversations over the bank holiday which went to the ‘wrong with me’ place. My friend was upset – ‘what’s wrong with me?’ You’re upset! There’s nothing ‘wrong’. I was angry – what’s wrong with me? Nothing. I was angry. I got over it! Another friend was feeling really exhausted – ‘what’s wrong with me?’ Nothing. She’s run down, tired and needs to chill out with a big bar of chocolate, a book and a bath. Once she’d done that over the weekend, the feeling of exhaustion went away.

As did the sense that something was ‘wrong’. What annoys me about this focus (and I do it too) is that it always puts us in the naughty chair. We’re angry, hurt, upset, feeling under the weather and we’re looking for ‘what’s wrong with me’. You know what? There’s nothing ‘wrong’ with you. You’re just human. Humans feel emotions. They feel hurt, jealousy, anger, embarrassment, sadness, tiredness. Humans (as a general rule) are not happy, skippy, bouncy every day. You know me, I’m a ‘joyful life’ coach – it’s all about enjoying your life for me.

But that doesn’t mean denying ‘negative’ emotions. That doesn’t mean putting yourself in the naughty corner for feeling how you feel. Ironically, living joyfully means living fully with your experience. It is very hard to be joyful when you have unacknowledged anger or sadness. It is difficult to be joyous when you are exhausted. But there is nothing ‘wrong’ with you when you get cross, when you are sad, when you are tired. You’re just cross, or sad, or tired. Not defective. So do me a favour and quit asking ‘what’s wrong with me’ because the truth is that you are beautiful, wonderful, fabulous, amazing, a unique, brightly shining star…and you’re allowed to be HUMAN!

Love

Donna.x