From “shit, what have I done?” to “I love my biz” in 11 short years

Warning!  I swear in this post.  A lot.  If you don’t like swearing, don’t read it!

It’s my biz birthday today! My biz is 11 years old. Actually, it’s 12 and a bit, but I’m only counting from when I took the plunge and leapt, utterly unprepared, into full time self-employment. Oh, it’s been a Quest of Epic Proportions! I was woefully underinformed, optimistic, naïve, and frankly foolish. That I’m still standing 11 years later is testament to three things:

  1. I’m stubborn. Like a fucking mule stubborn.
  2. I’m persistent. I had no idea how persistent I really was until I just kept going at it. For 11 years.
  3. I’m tenacious. I hold on. I cannot give up.

Ok, they’re all part of the same family…but different aspects, and I’ve needed them all.

Blind stubbornness for when it looks to all the world like I really should stop messing about at this now and get a job.

Persistence for when the failures pile up.

Tenacity for when the years wear on and I’m fucking worn out from the stress of having a business.

(Employed people, don’t think for a minute that because we self-employed folks skive off for coffee in the morning, have dance breaks in the afternoon and don’t have a jackass boss it’s easy to be self-employed. It’s not.)

So today, I was planning to share a lovely post about the 11 biggest lessons I’ve learned from 11 years in biz…but what is calling to be shared is the timeline of my biz…and what I learned at each stage…

Year 1:

Shit this is hard. Harder than I thought. Way harder than I thought.

Shit, what have I done?

Perhaps I should have paid off my debts and accumulated some savings before I started this?

Um, where the hell do people find clients?

I’m out of my depth and I haven’t the faintest idea what I’m doing!

When you start a biz, the learning curve is steeper than you ever imagined. Happily there are lots of people who will tell you what you need to do.

Year 2:

I don’t have what it takes.

All this networking and foisting my card on disinterested people that don’t care and will never get in touch makes me feel ill.

I should probably get a job…and yet…I discover reserves of stubbornness, persistence and tenacity…it can’t be that hard. If they can do it, so can I.

Work can, and often does come out of nowhere – usually when I’ve decided to dust off my CV and go jobhunting.

Writing isn’t as terrifying as I think – no one e-mails me to tell me I’ve mis-spelled a word or to tell me to stop bothering them…they can unsubscribe…but they don’t.

Year 3:

You can ignore what the hexperts tell you to do and figure out your own way to do it all – working with your natural strengths instead of blindly following what some brash, salesy, fool says is the way you have to do it (even though no one you know is having any success from this method)

Networking groups with all women are way more fun…and networking isn’t about foisting your card on people, but on building relationships. Who knew?

Public speaking isn’t as terrifying as you think. Ok, the first 8 times, it is. Then you start to relax and not tremble with fear as you speak.

And I wrote my first free ebook. Woohoo.

Year 4:

Marketing is letting people know what you do; sales is allowing them to enjoy what you do. Why the fuck did no one tell me that in earlier years?

Repeat business is way easier than new sales, and if you’re good (and friendly), people will want to rehire you and help you succeed.

And I wrote my first full ebook. Woohoo.

When you do something like that, there’s another huge learning curve. If you’re at the cutting edge of technology, you’ll need to educate people on what an ebook is as well as what it’s about. (seems absurd to reflect on that now)

Year 5:

Things get easier with time. Writing. Marketing. Sales.

I have a meltdown about every 6 months about giving up…and it’s normal. Shit, why did no one tell me that earlier?! Also, I’m improving…I used to have a meltdown every 3 months.

I am the worst boss I ever had…I’m a slave-driver and there is never one word of praise or encouragement. If I worked for me, I’d have wanted to stab me. Time to become ‘best boss ever’!

I still suck at selling – ze ebook sold about 10 copies in a year. (turns out you need to TELL people about it…but I didn’t really get that til year 10)

Year 6:

Sometimes you work really hard on one area…but get nothing, and things come in from left field. It’s not as linear as you might hope, but what is certain is that if you take action, something will happen…just not always what you intend or expect.

And sometimes, you do nothing and things happen. I gave up on my ebook and did zero marketing. I promptly sold 10x as many as I had before. No idea why.

Left field stuff is fun, if somewhat perplexing!

Employed people think you’re serious when you announce you want a job. You need to educate them that you are just letting off steam, like when they threaten to hit their boss in the face with a shovel…they don’t mean it, not really.

Year 7:

People are still talking shite about how you ‘have to’ do it to succeed.

They mean “this is how I did it” or sometimes “this is how I’ve heard you do it, but I’ve never actually done it that way myself, but I’ll still tell you to do it even though I’m talking out of my arse”.

I can still ignore them…and if I get the icky feeling when I even see their name, I can unsubscribe immediately.

I do not have to listen to people who make me feel icky. I can trust my “ickometer” and follow my own intuition.

Year 8:

I am super creative. Who knew?

I’d only written 100’s of articles, 2 ebooks and had 50 ideas for products and services…but I hadn’t spotted that I was creative. *shakes head*

This discovery came when I started making jewelry (for fun, that I then turned into a business – I’ve now also, apparently, got the entrepreneur mindset) and realised not only am I creative, but so is everyone else…and most of them think they’re not.

There’s an infinite creative well we all have access to. If you’re not creating, it’s because you’re not accessing that well,, not because you’re not creative.

Year 9:

Even after 9 years, business can still turn upside down, dump you on your arse and make you wish for a nice, safe J O B where they pay you and you get sick and holiday pay and someone tells you what to do.

I have endless reserves of stubbornness, tenacity and persistence…and this year, I need it!

A “free” coaching call can make you feel so energetically dirty that you have to walk in nature for an hour, write for an hour and have a light shower to get rid of the icky feeling between your shoulder blades.

I promise myself I will NEVER make someone feel like that. When I give a “free” coaching call, it’s about coaching, not converting, selling, pushing, persuading, manipulating or putting people in an awkward position and making them feel bad. I want them to come off a call with me feeling awesome.

People will tell you that you have to manipulate to sell. They’re idiots. People love buying, you just need to give them a reason to buy.

Year 10:

10 years is an amazing achievement!

It took someone else pointing this out to see it! Frankly, at this point, I was worn out from the 10 years – it didn’t feel like an achievement as much as a sentence I was serving.

I got over that feeling, thankfully.

You need to TELL people about your book, then they buy it (who knew?!).

Sometimes you need to tell them more often than you’re comfortable with. Let’s face it, sometimes you need to bore on about it for months…and even then, there’ll be friends who look at you blankly and say “you wrote a book? When?” *facepalm*

Year 11:

It gets easier. Writing. Sales. Marketing. Tech crap.

The learning curve isn’t as steep anymore – even when I’m doing something I’ve never done before, I know I’ll figure it out, I always do.

Auntie Google and other people are wonderful and you can learn how…or you can outsource and look good because other people are awesome!

I love my business with all my heart. That’s why I have been so stubborn, persistent and tenacious. I love what I do. I love where biz has taken me. I love the people I’ve met through my biz. I love how much I’ve changed. I love being the flaky one who always has a new idea, a new product, a new book. I love the highs and even the lows (lows are great teachers…and if I’ve experienced it, I can help you through it too). I love everything about it.

Happy birthday, darling biz. I love you…and here’s to another 11 years!

So there you have it, 11 years of biz learning. I could (and maybe I will) add to this – of course, I learnt more every year…much of which I’ve forgotten I needed to know. Even in the dark years of painful persistence, even in the many, many, many meltdowns, there’s gold to be gleaned, lessons to be learned (some over and over and over again), there’s joyful reflection to be had. And I invite you to reflect on your last 11 years of work or motherhood or whatever you’ve been up to since 2004 – what have you learned? Even in the dark times, even in the meltdowns, there’s gold to be gleaned.

Love Donna Blue 300px

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