recovery time

Recovery Time Is Not Just For Operations and Little Old Ladies!

I like to make a joke that I am a little old lady (and have been since the age of about 25!) and I need my nap time, rest time and recovery time. In my late twenties I was diagnosed with chronic fatigue, and I thought that was why I needed so much recovery time from night’s out. Then I was diagnosed with MS, and I thought that was the ‘reason’…but actually I know quite a few people who need recovery time…and they don’t have chronic fatigue or MS, but they are, like me, introverts.

Now, for those of you who’ve met me, I am a very sociable introvert, yes! Introverted doesn’t mean shy, it means you get your energy from being alone, and you tend to find people very draining! I love people, I love my friends…but time constantly ‘doing’ and being ‘with’ people is exhausting for me.

Which is why, when I’m away, I try to build in alone time if I’m with people – you’ll find my nose buried in a book, I’ll be in the garden when everyone else is inside, or in the kitchen when everyone else is in the garden. It’s not that I’m anti-social, it’s because if I am constantly with people, I end up feeling like a dried husk of a person with no energy left!

And it’s also why if I’ve had a weekend away, I tend to take a couple of days off to recover before throwing myself back into the next busy day. If I don’t, I get exhausted and drained, and usually fall ill. And this is not just what happens to people with Chronic Fatigue, or MS, or introversion…it happens to all of us! We push and push and push and allow ourselves no recovery or relaxation time – and then we are surprised to be sick.

Then we don’t give ourselves recovery time from being sick, and the cycle continues! Be honest, how many times have you rushed yourself back to work when you’re only 51% well? How often have you gone from busy week to busy weekend to busy week again? How often do you actually look at your diary and say “woah, I need to build in some rest time there”?

For too many of us, the answer is never to the last one! Because that would be pathetic, or sad, or old-ladyish, or some other unflattering description of taking care of yourself. You know the attitude: “go hard or go home”; “eating’s cheating” and all the other sayings we think are cool and funny and show how great a life we have because we’re always ‘on’, always busy, always out… always exhausted!

Sometimes all you need is a snooze on a lilo in a pool.  Image credit:  jdurham on morguefile
Sometimes all you need is a snooze on a lilo in a pool. Image credit: jdurham on morguefile
You don’t have to fill every single moment of your life with stuff to do. You don’t have to accept every invitation that’s extended. You’re allowed to make choices about what to do with YOUR life. I know not everyone is lucky enough to be able to just take time off when they need to, but there are small changes you can make that allow you to honour yourself and take great care of you without becoming a complete hermit!

1. Look at your diary properly.

When accepting an invitation or meeting, check what’s happening around that day – if you’re out for the 6 previous evenings, you might want to take a raincheck! I started this one Christmas when I realised that I was almost always ill at Christmas because I’d been busy like a mad person for the 24 days leading up to it!

2. Notice how you feel.

Are you constantly exhausted, running on adrenalin and well aware that if you stop, you’ll crash? If it’s that bad, book a holiday! If it’s not quite that bad, but you’re pretty tired, take some time for you. One day, one evening, one hour where you do something that restores your energy and refills the well.

3. Check how cared for you feel right now

Breathe into your heart and ask your heart how cared for you feel on a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘I don’t’ and 10 is ‘cradled in the arms of love’. If it’s less than a 7, your only job is to take care of yourself right now.

4. Don’t try to ‘keep up with the hypers’

Some people naturally have lots of energy, others are living on caffeine and stress. If you don’t have lots of energy naturally, don’t try to keep up with people with hyper energy.

5. Understand your energy levels

Know what drains you, what energises you, when you feel good, when you feel like a little old lady…and act on the understanding! If, like me, a weekend away with people is tiring to you, take some time to recuperate afterwards, even if it’s only a few hours of chill out time.

6. Be ok with needing what you need

Whether it’s needing little old lady naps, hippie meditation time, earth mother barefoot oustide time, lazy bastard time! This 24/7 culture we have now is a fairly modern invention, and I’m quite convinced it’s not a good thing for us – physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually. Be ok with however you need to unplug from the madness of life. Little old lady naps (lol naps) are one of my favourite things to do…and this article was largely written while I was snoozing this afternoon!

We’ve all seen our friends and family run themselves into the ground, into debilitating and sometimes life-threatening illnesses by refusing to take the time to recover. Don’t buy into that. Take the recovery time you need, and ensure that you have the energy, space and time to enjoy your life!

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Comments

8 responses to “Recovery Time Is Not Just For Operations and Little Old Ladies!”

  1. Donnaonthebeach avatar

    Yes! Well said Karen! xxx

  2. Karen J avatar

    Yay! for MyOwnPermission!
    *I’m* the one who has to live -24/7- with the consequences of whatever I decide to do.
    *You* can let me know what you’d like to see me do, but you don’t get to make the final decision.

    Big hugs for all us “Little Old Ladies” 🙂

  3. Donnaonthebeach avatar

    Yup, it’s hard for people who don’t ‘need’ the down time to get why we need to be alone and relax (and for people who don’t allow themselves recovery time to allow it for us!), just as it’s hard for me to understand how anyone can be around people 24/7 without going batcrap crazy! x

  4. Nela avatar

    Oh I so hear you!
    I desperately need my down time. On one occasion my boyfriend nagged me to meet him for drinks with his friends even though I’ve trued to explain I just can’t be around people 24/7 (I was staying with a friend for a week and we had guests every night, I just wanted to get away!) and in the end I had a mini-breakdown and we had a huge fight. It’s so hard to explain to others how important down time is for us introverts!

    Thank you for writing this, a lot of people need this! It’s not just a reminder, it’s a permission for us to be the way we are even when we feel a bit weird 🙂

  5. Donnaonthebeach avatar

    Lol. thanks Sue. Yes, it’s such a relief to be who you are and to be ok with it, including your energy levels…and how much you like naps!! x

  6. Sue Kearney (@MagnoliasWest) avatar
    Sue Kearney (@MagnoliasWest)

    Donna, thanks! Building in recovery time, after jaunts away, and even between work activities, has been a difficult but totally worthwhile habit for me to create.

    And when I am socializing, I am perfectly fine with arriving and leaving early, and making myself useful at a party (I’m the one carving the turkey, or helping cook) so that I can be at ease.

    And I’m gaining so much strength by accepting my energy levels as my own, and not torturing myself by thinking I have to be like anyone else!

    Yay for naps, and basking in the sunshine, and did I say naps? 🙂

    Thanks

  7. Donnaonthebeach avatar

    Thanks Jodi! Yeah, I think we introverts are particularly hard on ourselves for needing that recovery time…but fighting the reality doesn’t help much!! 😀 x

  8. Jodi Chapman avatar

    This is such a great article and a wonderful reminder for me (a fellow introvert) to go easier on myself and relax a little bit more. Thank you! 🙂