OnTheBeach: Lighten Up

So last week I told you that when I chilled out about getting stuff done, I got more stuff done. It’s ironic, right? And yet today, again, I’m experiencing the truth of it – as soon as I relaxed about getting this article written (in fact, I’d decided not to write it today!), I started writing it. All I was going to do was open the file, write the introduction (which also makes me smile, because normally that’s the bit I struggle with!) and the extra bits, and leave the article until inspiration struck.

So, as I was writing the introduction for my newsletter subscribers, and digging out my ‘Rules‘, inspiration struck. In every client session I have done this week, we’ve talked about some aspect of ‘lightening up’ – most of us are really hard on ourselves, set ourselves impossible expectations and rigid rules (designed to keep our noses firmly to the grindstone, not like the Life Rules I want you to have for yourself which help you enjoy life more!). When we do this, we make life so much harder. Let me tell you, every one of my clients is an awesome person with exciting things ahead of them and much to be proud of themselves for. (Just like you, in fact, dear reader!)

And yet they are super hard on themselves. If this helped, I’d say “Go ahead, that’s really working for you”. But, of course, it doesn’t help. In fact, just as me making writing this article such a big deal actively stopped me writing it, my clients find the same – the thing they are trying so hard to do is being blocked by the fact that they are trying so hard. Don’t you just love that? (Maybe it’s just coaches who will find that delicious – we’re weird like that!)

I was once told that as soon as I got out of my own way, my life would work out perfectly! And I can attest that this is perfectly true. The chief way I get in my own way? Forgetting that the purpose of life is to enjoy it – that life is a dance of joyful discovery. Every time I get all serious and start making everything so significant and tense, I feel like I am walking uphill through treacle with steel boots on. The moment I lighten up, life gets easier again, and I feel like I am really getting somewhere. I once said to my spiritual team “Give me the message over and over until I get it”, and this aspect of life is one that they seem to throw, like a pie in my face, on a regular basis.

I’m happy to say, I’m starting to get it! Because the difference is so obvious – it’s a powerful contrast between life being hard and life being easy. So what exactly does to ‘lighten up’ mean? I know MY definition, but what does Auntie Google have to say? “To make light or lighter; illuminate or brighten”; “To be luminous; shine”; “To take matters less seriously”; “To make more cheerful” are just some of the utterly gorgeous definitions I discovered. My own definition is “To chill out, relax, stop worrying, enjoy life, be cheerful and silly, and take life lightly”. But I think I am going to add in the others too, because I’m loving this more inclusive description of the nature of lightening up!

Don’t you just love that? Lighten up: Make light or lighter, illuminate, brighten, be luminous and shine, take matters less seriously, be cheerful, chill out, relax, stop worrying, be silly ,enjoy life and take life lightly! Simple. Not always easy, of course, when the days are dark, the weight of the world is on your shoulders and you are stressed and on the serious treadmill of life. But everytime you remember to Lighten Up, you are strengthening your Lighten Up muscles and making it easier to choose to be light again, and again, and again.

Funnily enough, my word for the year is LIGHT. (I’ve only just made the connection…d’oh!) I’m looking forward to reaching new heights of lightness, being more and more cheerful and silly and illuminating and brightening and shining. Boy, that description alone makes my heart skip a beat and my soul sing! Could you do with lightening up in your life? Where can you see that lightness will help you enjoy and live your life to the fullest extent possible? Could lightening up a little help you dance joyously through life with a smile on your face and a song in your heart? Perhaps it’s worth playing with eh? Join me and make it a rule for this year: Lighten Up!

– Something to Play With –

What can you do, specifically to bring more lightness into your life? What do you do to remember to ‘lighten up’? I would love to hear your thoughts about this article, please leave a comment below.

Love

Donna.x