OnTheBeach: The Gulf Between Fantasy and Reality

Working in the sun in a lovely warm country is one of my Big Dreams – it’s one of the reasons I’m creating my business the way I am, so that I can easily work from anywhere in the world. The trouble is, there is a bit of a gulf between the fantasy of working ‘anywhere’ and the reality.

The Fantasy:

There will be no worries

The reality:

Little ants descend in their hordes on the kitchen, the dog’s dry food and water (why???!), the drawer with the cat treats in, and my BED (don’t even get me started on this!); the cat won’t eat her food because of the crushed up worming tablet mixed in it; On one side I have 7 kids (7!!!), on the other I have 4…and a dog who is super protective and barks at any sound, and the wifi works best in the spots closest to the noise. Sigh. Problems are all around.

The Fantasy:

You will start every day with yoga

The reality:

You start every day walking the dog before it gets too hot, then are hungry, so decide ‘I’ll do my yoga shortly’, but then it’s too darn hot to stand on the patio area where you have the room to do yoga. Also, the insect issue totally put you off the idea of getting a yoga mat so it’s standing yoga postures only. You end up doing less yoga than you do at home.

The Fantasy:

Your bad habit of playing facebook games every day will be broken

The reality:

HA! Your bad habit of playing facebook games continues unabated. Really must break that habit when I get home!

The Fantasy:

You’ll break your habit of watching the idiot box every day

The reality:

BBC World news and a really bad music channel which plays nothing but 80’s classics on endless repeat (seriously, I can’t tell you how often I’ve heard La Bamba and Vienna and horror of horrors “I think we’re alone now” :rollseyes: in the past few days) become your best friends. Also, you discover “Bondi Rescue”, “International House Hunters” and “Piha Rescue” – compulsive viewing! (oh, and Abu Dhabi TV are screening Wimbledon…break the habit of watching the idiot box my a**e)

The Fantasy:

It’ll be lovely to have some alone time

The reality:

Within days you’re lonely and homesick, and delight in ‘supermarket conversations’ where you exchange hilarious stories of how you’ve ended up with 5 bottles of shower gel because you don’t know the Spanish for body lotion or bubble bath. Fortunately the neighbours are lovely, and you know some friends of the people you’re dogsitting for, so they stop you from going completely loopy.

The Fantasy:

You’ll get LOADS of work done.

The reality:

All your productivity lessons learnt over the last year seep out of your head, and you do what you have to, no more. Also, the wifi broadband is unreliable, and you will spend a lot of time waiting and refreshing (buhlieve me, I’ll be SO grateful for my normal whizzy fast broadband when I get home!) – this alone makes you want to go sit in the comfy chair reading a book. Basically, not a stitch of work gets done because you are working your way through your host’s bookshelf and sitting in the sun. 😀

The Fantasy:

You will eat local cuisine and dine healthily.

The reality:

It’s a tourist area, so British and German food is pretty much all the local supermarkets sell…Canarians wouldn’t dream of shopping in these overpriced shops, so they don’t really stock anything Canarians might eat. I do regularly buy Patata Tortilla’s though.

The Fantasy:

You’ll lose weight

The reality:

They sell chocolate and Paprika Pringles in the local shop. Despite walking the dog twice a day and walking to the village and “best sunset spot” every day up and down hills, the calorie intake is keeping up with the exercise regime…unless of course I’m building muscle…I certainly feel like I have the calves of a cage-fighter right now.

The Fantasy:

You’ll swim every day in the pools and the sea

The reality:

You left your cozzie at home, and spend the next 3 weeks looking for swimwear you will be happy to be seen in public in. You don’t find any. Seriously, why do they insist on padding the cozzies??? I do NOT need any extra padding in that area thanks. And the unpadded ones are so old ladyish you can’t bring yourself to part with lots of euros for one. Ah, who needs swimming anyway?

The Fantasy:

I shall boldly ask people I have met 3 times or so to give me a lift to the supermarket to get heavy things like 8 litre bottles of water.

The reality:

I become (ok, I am) terribly British and hate to put people out, so I sweat up and down the hills carrying heavy things like 8 litre bottles of water. By week 3, I have tennis elbow and cannot straighten my arm without howling in pain. Now I shall have to boldly ask for help, or die of thirst. Hmm. If this display of ridiculousness (Britishness) confuses you – take a look at this to get an idea of British Problems. And yes, we are all that nuts.

The Fantasy:

I will spend less time on my laptop.

The reality:

Hahahahahahahaaha – starts hiccupping from laughing so hard. No such luck! You know what I said earlier about being lonely and the shite music channel on the tv? Well, my laptop is my link back to a world where I know people, and music made in the last 20 years is played, so it’s on constantly! Thank God for bbc radio iplayer, Skype and Test Match Sofa!

The Fantasy:

I will not spend much money

The reality:

What a ridiculous idea. Staying in someone else’s home should mean you don’t need much, but you can never find essential things like clingfilm (until you’ve just paid an extortionate amount for crap clingfilm, then you find 100 rolls). Also, you’re in a new country, a new climate, you have needs you never anticipated.

I wanted to share these things with you because it’s important to realise that Big Dreams don’t always work out the way you expect. The reality is often a lot messier than the fantasy. Honestly, even though I’ve been here before, and I knew I would be looking after dogs and cats and plants, and I know that when the sun shines, I am disinclined to do anything constructive, I didn’t anticipate that there would be any problems.

Sometimes the problems you face are just funny, and make for a great story for your friends to laugh at. But sometimes it can make you think that you don’t really want your Big Dreams after all, they’re too much damn hassle! Honestly, the night of the Ant Invasion of the Bed, I’d have gone home that moment if I could have. But that’s what happens – we start to get what we want, and stuff comes up we just didn’t anticipate – it turns out to be messier than our fantasy Dream Life.

And that’s ok – it’s not a sign that the Divine Spirit has abandoned you, or that you shouldn’t have your dream, or that you should forever stay home and forget about making your Big Dreams come true. It’s just part of the process – marrying the reality of your Big Dream with your fantasy. And it happens to everyone.

Writers discover that being a published author brings new challenges – deadlines, editors who want to change their work, expectations of publishers to live up to. People who start a business discover that the worst boss they ever had is themselves. World travellers discover that being poorly in a foreign country sucks. It’s been called “new level, new devil”. It’s a natural part of the growing pains, and it is absolutely no reason to stay put and shy away from your Dreams.

Even with the ants, and the lack of constructive work being done, this is still a wonderful experience (I’m not sure how I’m going to cope with needing long sleeves, long trousers and socks when I go home). Getting your Big Dreams is always better than not trying, even if it doesn’t live up to the fantasy. And now you know it happens to everyone, you don’t need to get freaked out when it happens to you – you just deal with the issues that come up, and enjoy the reality of your Dream coming true.

What realities have you come up against when your Big Dreams came true?

Love

Donna.x