This week’s article was inspired by talking to a friend of mine about recovering from illness and injury and how much patience it requires.
I’m not the most patient person you’ll ever meet.
In fact, impatient has been one of the most used words to describe me over the years.
When someone said to me “Patience is a virtue” I used to answer back “Which I do not possess”.
But like so many other things in life (positivity, optimism, tenacity, courage, confidence), patience is not something you either have or have not.
Yes, some people are naturally more patient than others, but those others can practice patience.
You can cultivate patience and train yourself to be more patient.
And if lack of patience causes you to suffer in life – with stress, with wishing life to be different, with feeding anger – I urge you to do so.
I’ve had to learn greater patience over the years – technology has been one of my greatest teachers, as has writing books (oh my God, the delays!!!!! Infuriating).
But this MS relapse has been my greatest ever teacher of patience.
In the beginning, I thought a week or two off would see me right.
Then perhaps a month.
Then maybe 2-3 months.
Then it was maybe after Christmas I’ll be ok.
Then perhaps spring.
Now I’ve kind of given up on a time frame, but I am (mentally) prepared for it to take a year or more for me to recover back to my previous level of life (if that’s possible).
I’m being patient, and letting life unfold in its own time, letting healing take the time it needs to.
I don’t want you to think this was an easy process, a graceful acceptance of my fate.
Oh no. I railed against it. I got frustrated. I got impatient. I got angry with my body. I got angry with this damn disease. I got angry with the lack of a quick fix. The lack of any fix at all.
And I suffered. Anger isn’t fun. Frustration isn’t joyous. Impatient doesn’t feel good.
So I realised that I needed to exercise patience (and acceptance but we’ll talk about that one another day).
I needed to remove my self-imposed deadlines.
I needed to stop trying to rush back to my previous level of health (a delicious irony as this desire to rush is part of what landed me in this mess!).
I needed to be OK with the fact that change is taking its own sweet time.
And isn’t that life? Step by painstaking step things change (and ideally improve).
This is how new books get written, lives get fallen in love with, businesses get built, dreams get brought to life, bodies heal.
It’s not (usually) a magic, instantaneous KABOOM of glitter and success.
It’s doing the 1% actions day in, day out – those small things that will move you forward (ironically, in my case, resting – there’s no doing at all).
You need persistence, tenacity and above all, patience to see your dreams come true.
Even, and especially, when that dream is getting your health back!
What in life are you being impatient about? What is making you cross because it’s not happening fast enough?
What if you decided to practice patience and chilled out about it?
What if you did what you could and let it happen in its own sweet time?
It won’t slow it down any (unless you stop doing your part), but it will make the experience easier, less stressful and ironically it might actually speed things up!
If you’re in this position right now – impatient about healing, recovering, adjusting or changing your life, contact me and tell me about it – there’s power in connecting to others, and I’d love to hear I’m not alone in this life lesson of patience.
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