The first anniversary of my uncle’s death has just passed…I can hardly believe that it’s been a year already – where does the time go? In an attempt to finally process what happened, I’ve been looking at my diaries and blog entries for this time last year, and finally writing about what happened. I’m letting go of a little of the grief and pain and horror and anger and bewilderment, and as I do I can feel my body, mind and soul releasing some of the tension I’ve been holding for a year.
Things happen in life, and we need to process what’s happened, to let it go, to heal. So many of us just hold it in, and we either explode with long held pain at inappropriate moments or we make ourselves desperately ill. Sometimes with fatal consequences. Everyone has their own way of dealing with grief, pain, anger, hurt…just make sure that you ARE dealing with yours, not just hiding it away for 20 years.
For the last year, I haven’t been able to deal with it at all – every time I tried, I had to retreat in confusion and bury it all again. Now, the time has come to begin to work it through. Even as I write this, I can feel the pain in my heart waiting for release. Is there pain in your heart that you can let go? The trouble with holding the pain there is that it covers up the love that’s there – your heart should be soft, flowing, beautiful love. Not hard, painful, crusted hurt.
The time has come for me…maybe it’s time for you too?
Love
Donna.x